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title: In My Dreams |
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published: 2019-02-05 |
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> in my dreams youre alive and youre crying |
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in my dreams, my day dreams, my night dreams, when my mind wanders, when im thinking hard, or not thinking at all, i can see you alive, and i can see you crying. |
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myself, stuck in my dreams, able to only watch, and cry. |
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you cry when im weak, you cry when im stupid, you cry when im not myself. |
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everytime my will breaks, you cry |
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everytime i sacrifice my ideals for some neurotypical urge, you cry |
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everytime i give up, lay down, and rot, you cry. |
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everytime i be anything less than you, you cry, and i cry, because all i want to be is you. |
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there are other times, however. |
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everynow and then, when i take a second to think about what im doing, and like it, and find myself smiling, you cry |
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you weep tears of joy, because im closer to the real me. |
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im not the man that many others would strive to be, im not physically fit, im not an order of magnitude smarter than other people. |
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im not emotionally strong, im not mentally capable, but i am something. |
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im the mind that is like no other, and once i find the way through this maze ill find you, and ill rescue you, and well cry no more. |
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in reality, youll be alive and smiling, as will i. |
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`:wq` |